In the age of extensive electronic communication, made even more widespread by the COVID-19 pandemic, it’s important to think about how we communicate with friends, loved ones, fellow workers, and others. Good communication is foundational to establishing and maintaining healthy relationships.
It’s common knowledge that good communication –getting our message across and understanding what others are trying to tell us– is based on verbal (including tone of voice) and non-verbal cues. So, if we are mostly communicating electronically, how can we enrich our texts, dms, emails, facetime, Snapchat, and conference calls to ensure the best communication possible?
Here are a few ideas to consider:
USE THE BEST TYPE OF COMMUNICATION FOR THE SITUATION.
Text messaging, or dm-ing through apps like Instagram or Snapchat is great for communicating neutral, factual information such as a quick message to say hello, logistical arrangements, contact information, sending memes and gifs, etc. It is not good for emotionally charged communication, involved discussion, or complicated situations.
E-mail allows you to provide more detailed explanations and includes more significant attachments for explaining complicated situations or topics. It is limited, just like texting, in how well it works in relational or emotional situations.
Calling someone adds the element of hearing each other and getting a better idea of the “tone” of the conversation. If the topic is more about your relationship with someone, a disagreement, or other emotionally charged situations, consider facetiming each other to enrich understanding by viewing body language.
Face-to-face communication may be critical for addressing and resolving some issues. If you are in a serious disagreement or discussion, it is probably best to figure out a safe way to get together so you can communicate directly and have the benefits of verbal and non-verbal cues.
USE GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS IN EVERY FORMAT.
Whether texting, emailing, calling, or talking face-to-face, think about what tone you are setting. Are you choosing words and using them in a way that clearly expresses your ideas without having any overtones that you do not intend? For example, a text saying: “Pick up coffee on your way over” (a command) comes across harsher than, “Could you please pick up coffee on your way here?” (a request). It may seem like a small thing, but good relationships are built on the many little things that show whether you value and care for a person.
Before hitting the “send” button on any written communication, read it over, and ask yourself if the message is clear, has the tone you intended, or could be misread in any way. The politeness and care you express in your communication, of any form, can enhance your relationships. Likewise, you can unwittingly damage relationships by failing to consider how others might interpret your messages.
Finally, when facetiming/ conferencing with others or meeting together, make sure your communication partner is the center of your attention. Practice good eye contact and minimize distractions so you can both fully enjoy the face-to-face time. At a time such as this, when being together has become precious, practice good communication to demonstrate how much you treasure time with those you love and value.
